2001-08-14 - 11:18 p.m.
it has been another fairly interesting day. a day of mtv, shopping, neatza, and yet, so much more. it was so wondeful to see shareen and mauldin today. they both [and dave] gave the hair color(s) two thumbs up, and i trust these kids, so im cool with it. mauldin [the man] made me a free pizza to commemorate the special occasion. how lovely for him to join dave shareen and i for a bit. we are all dreading school tommorow [wait, school? huh? i dont know what im talking about. no school.] and dont really know how to handle any of it. i honestly dont know how i will. i will be at school tommorow, and dave wont. bluh! hell! shareen and i were laughing it up, as usual. it felt nice to be there, at ease, its just plain easy with those kids.
these things were all great, but tonight was what made the day interesting. i arrived at home to the sight of my crying mother and laughing father. whoa, weird. my dad said to sit down with them, that we were going to have a talk. what i write now has got to be the most stunning news that i have ever recieved from my parents. it shouldnt be so odd, but i guess that since ive never witnessed them do anything like it, that it seemed so distant in the range of possibility.
next year, at this time, when i am leaving for college, my parents are leaving too. they are selling the only home that i have ever knonw, all of their expensive furnishings, and every minute that they spent making this home as comfortable as it is. they are selling it all, and moving to the beach with nothing. from scratch. my dad said that he might be serving coffee or shucking oysters, but that he will pay for my college education in full, that i never have to worry about it. that is the sweet part, the bitter part is of course, the selfish part. i will no longer have a home to come to when i am not dwelling in a 12x12 dormatory with another lost bastard like myself. but, i could not be happier. the part about me losing a home is so small in comparison to what my parents [and possibly i] will gain from this. my mother is exhausted, drained, and bored. my father is lost, and fearful of regret, and most notably, determined to prove to himself that he is still spontaneous. THIS, i respect.
the conversation evolved into so much more than just this. the whole family was in tears at different parts, and i think that we all learned something from it.
i termed it as "we are all becomming independent, together." yes yes, the contradictory phrases. alexis loves them. but it makes sense.
also, i have news for scott, but wont write it here.
it was good. and now i know where scott and i have recieved our urges to get away, move on, and start over. finally, it makes sense. my dad feels the same way, and i never knew it.
thats all that i care to write about that, although there was so much more to the 4 hour long conversation. so goodnight. sleep peacefully. take care.
