2001-08-13 - 12:02 a.m.
and im in a good mood, and thats a relief. i have a few things to be sad about, but dave is my lifesaver.
clay called today literally 2 minutes before dave was due to arrive to pick me up. told me that his aunt mimi had been given one month to live. as i have written before, she has bone cancer, but somehow, i have managed to push her or the cancer to the back of my mind for the past few months. i guess i just didnt think that she would die. i really didnt. i never expected to get that call, either. he wants me to go up and visit her with him next weekend. i think that i would like that. although, she will wonder why he and i arent still together. shes a wonderful person. i love her dearly. she is the aunt that lives on clays familys farm. never been married. elementary school teacher. sweetest person in the world. she doesnt deserve to suffer, and especially die. shes the last person that does.
there is another family member of a friend who has a 70% chance to survive his cancer of the stomach. i have been asked not to disclose who he is, but he is in his 20s, and just got married. why in the world isnt cancer fukin cured yet? why oh why. it makes so little sense in my head.
but dave swept me away, and thats how i can cope with this news. after we saw amer. pie 2, we also saw aaron, sam, and ashley at the theater. we actually went at a different time than i told aaron to avoid sam and ashley, but it didnt work. i talked to aaron for a bit, waved and said hello to sam, and ashley kept her fuckin back to me the entire time, the bitch. she could have at least faced me, instead she cowered like the dumb jealous bitch that she is. wow. im getting really worked up about this now. i dont mean to sound egocentric or better than her, but its true, shes so damn jealous. shes lost two guys to me. first sam, whom she thought she had assimilated into her stupid depressing surreal world. and then dave, whom she crushed and agonized over for months. HAHA ashley! eat me, loser.
shit, im mean. i think that i almost manufacture things to be mad at her for though... or at least exaggerate them. she obviously does the same thing with me [*ahem, halloween costume?]. i dunno, i think that i kind of like having a nemesis. my melodramatic self enjoys preforming a good underlying, subconcious, telepathic ass kicking every now and then. she hears me, oh yes, she hears me...
okay so im mean, and weird.
all bitches aside, tonight was more than lovely. it seems like almost every day that dave and i get better and better together. im so relieved that he can be open with me. im so relieved that hes so genuine and, well, perfect. hes perfect for me, thats all.
ohhh me. im tired. goodnight, and take care.
